It's time for ....The Talk

I don't usually have time to sit down and watch TV during the day, but I try to make time to watch The Talk. I used to watch The View, but I got so tired of all the arguing...and they are soooo opinionated! For some of these woman it's their way or no way! The ladies on The Talk seem much nicer than the other ladies...and more down to earth. They agree to disagree. Leah Remini gets on my nerves at times, but sometimes I wish I could be as bold as she is.

Julie Chen starts the show with a topic for the ladies to discuss. Today's topic was

'Do you know or are you a Downer, Samer, or Topper?"

A "Downer" is someone who brings you down in stead of lifting you up. Or bring the conversation down by saying something negative pertaining to what you are talking about. For instance...I know of this Facebook page that has contests from time to time. Instead of congratulating the person who won, this one woman complains to the winner by commenting "I wish I could win a contest. I never win anything." This is the type of person who always 'rains on your parade'. Have you ever started the day in good spirits until you come across this person? Then if you allow it, your day can be ruined by their negative attitude or behavior. And if you lose weight, and they haven't and you know you're looking good, they make a point not to say anything or say something negative "I see you've lost weight. I'd hate to be the one having to buy all new clothes. I'd rather spend my money on something else!" 

Do you see these people in the grocery store...and while you're walking up to them you're thinking about "what I can I say to make them happy"? They are one of these "if it weren't for back luck, I'd have no luck at all" type of people. I will do whatever I can to help them have a better day or attitude, but sometimes there is just no encouraging this person. In my opinion this type of person is very insecure. They can't be content with what they have or the situation they're in. Sometimes, the only thing you can really do is pray for them.

A "Samer" is the type of person I like to be around. Someone who is on common ground with me. Someone who understands or empathizes with how I feel. Someone who will say "Girl, I know what you mean!" " I feel your pain." "I completely understand how you feel." or "I'm so excited for you!" This is the person who won't try to bring you down or out do your conversation. These people are more encouraging and supportive with whatever you've got going on in your life. Most of my friends are like this. Sure, they're going to have a bad day from time to time, or feel sad about something, but it's not a daily thing for them. They don't make themselves feel this way, and they won't try to bring you down while having a discussion with you. 

If your opinion or doing something your way is different, it doesn't mean that it's wrong. They...like the ladies on The Talk...agree to disagree.

Then there's the "Topper". This is someone who has to out do everything you do or say. If your child makes a homerun at a little league game...instead of sharing in your pride and joy they'll tell you "yea well, my son made four homeruns" or when you try a new recipe and talk about how great it turned out..."You think that's good, you should try my recipe, you'll like it even better!" This person can't seem to share in your joy. And oh Lordy...if you're sick, they've been more sick! Their fever was always higher or their cough was always worse. There are two types of "Toppers"...the type that have themselves convinced they are so much better than you are or those that are so insecure with themselves that they have to put themselves high up on their own pedestal to make themselves feel better. But, the effect on you could be the same....so, instead of allowing myself to feel inferior to them or try to bring them down off their high horse, to avoid conflict, I will do what I can to help them stay up there. "Good for you!" "I'm so happy for you!" or "I'm so sorry you were that sick. I'm glad you're feeling better!" It just seems to work out better than way.

I'm sure you know someone who is like each of these people.  

Do you encourage or avoid the "Downer"? 

Do you congratulate or avoid the "Topper"?

To be perfectly honest, (I can not tell a lie) at one point or another, I know I've been each of these people. It depends on what was going on with me at the time..an illness, an overall bad day... I've had my down days, my pity parties (where I'm the only one invited) and I've had days "if it can go wrong, it will go wrong".  

But, I'm happy to say, for the most part...I am a "Samer"!